#014 How to Deal With Obstacles in Your Life

This episode deals with the common issue of self-judgement and how it can affect how you deal with the obstacles in your life.  

We all know the feeling of being judged by others, but what about when we judge ourselves?

What You’ll Learn in this Podcast:

1. How to reclaim your power
2. Allah’s promise of a solution
3. How to stop the self-judgement cycle

Mentioned on the Podcast: (Click on Links)

• Nafs Coaching School
• Mind Health & Relationship training (Free Training & Newsletter)

Destructive or Constructive Judgement?  

Sometimes we are our own harshest judges. We set high standards and expectations, and when we don’t meet them, we start to berate and criticise ourselves.

This is a devastating and destructive problem that many people suffer from. In my Coaching Institute, I see this all the time. 

This is a challenge people face even if they are successful in different areas of their lives. Success doesn’t always shield us from self-judgement. 

In my life, I’ve seen two types of successful people and this is a generalisation so it’s not absolute. But to keep it simple, I categorise it into two.

The one type is those people who outwardly appear to have it all but feel something is missing. They’re doing great in their career, and successful in their businesses. 

Financially they’re secure and they even have a busy social life. 

Yet, amidst all of that, they don’t know what’s missing but they feel it inside. 

The other type of successful people are those who achieved success and the different milestones in their lives but they feel like they haven’t met their expectations.  

They feel like their life doesn’t square up with the picture of what they assumed their life would be like. As a result, they bash themselves and tell themselves they’re not good enough.

Self-judgement can lead to feelings of isolation, disconnection, and misunderstanding.

But it’s important to know that you’re never alone and there’s always a way out. 

Allah (swt) says in the Quran,

‘Whoever has Taqwa of Allah, Allah will make a way out for them.’

That’s a promise from the One who created you and brought you into this world.

So you don’t have to rely on yourself because Allah will give you a solution.

As a coach, whenever I deal with problems, I see one common factor playing out over and over again, in different lives. We are forever trying to find a quick fix. 

Instead of relying on quick fixes or distractions, embrace change and seek solutions beyond your comfort zone.

Relying on the Source of Tranquility 

Allah’s promise is a guarantee and you can absolutely trust and rely on His promise.

Having Taqwa and relying on Allah means having hope and faith in His promise. It’s not wishful thinking.

It’s a deep belief that Allah will provide a way out and it’s a matter of your faith that will raise you above your challenges.

Judgement is something we see more and more in our own lives. It’s self-inflicted and it’s external when others judge us. 

The difference is we can stay away from others if we’re being judged by them but we have to be with ourselves all the time. 

So what do you do?

You can leave the judgement and decide that you’re no longer doing it to yourself. Let go of those expectations that you’re using to beat yourself up with. 

By letting go of self-criticism and relying on Allah, you can be successful in all aspects of your life.

Stop relying on yourself and start relying on Allah. We can become as powerful as we want if we rely on the All-Powerful.

That’s your support network. That’s what you need.

Self-judgement curbs our ability and potential and we lose our power. 

All you have to do is let go and rely on Allah and you have to take action. But the action will follow the belief and when you become certain, you will become motivated.

You’ll have the drive that you need. And you’ll take the correct action. 

It’s not that you don’t take action in your life at the moment but you take the action that doesn’t serve you. 

And when you start relying on Allah, you’ll see that change.